Don Hall 7/5/21 Don Hall 7/5/21

I Believe… [Language Policing]

...that in our further policing of language, we should definitely move away from the term “asshole” and use the less oppressive term “outward facing anal pore”.

Don Hall 6/28/21 Don Hall 6/28/21

I Believe… [Reward for Responsible Behavior]

...that creating lotteries and prizes for people getting vaccinated is no different than giving your kid a dollar for eating his broccoli. It wastes the dollar and sets up expectation for extortion for basic common decency. Next Up: state-sponsored Visa Gift Cards if you wear a self belt or refrain from beating up an old Asian woman.

Don Hall 6/21/21 Don Hall 6/21/21

I Believe... [Being Seen]

...that the cost of being seen is that you might actually be seen.

Don Hall 6/14/21 Don Hall 6/14/21

I Believe... [Going Nuclear]

I believe… that, if we truly want to turn back climate disaster, an embrace of nuclear power is absolutely necessary. It’s clean, abundant, and contributes a zero sum carbon footprint.

Don Hall 6/7/21 Don Hall 6/7/21

I Believe... [Same Culture Wars, Different Decade]

...that the culture wars ongoing are no different than the culture wars fought in the 90s except with social media the exponential growth of extremist crackpots makes it seem so much more pressing. We didn’t know how many idiots were out there in the 90s because we weren’t subject to their crazy yet.

Don Hall 5/31/21 Don Hall 5/31/21

I Believe... [Time>Money]

...that volunteering your time and energy is more helpful than your money or your social media approval.

Don Hall 5/24/21 Don Hall 5/24/21

I Believe... [The Venn Diagram is Just a Circle]

I believe... that, ironically, the Venn diagram between calling for the destruction of the world's only Jewish state and calling other citizens "Nazis" is simply a solid circle.

Don Hall 5/17/21 Don Hall 5/17/21

I Believe... [Children Listen]

I believe... that if you treat people like children, they learn to behave like children.

Don Hall 5/3/21 Don Hall 5/3/21

I Believe... [Parsing Out Sensitivity]

I believe... that we should all be more sensitive but not be more sensitive. The former is about simple politeness, the latter is about myopic self-centeredness.

Don Hall 4/26/21 Don Hall 4/26/21

I Believe… [Irrelevant Academy]

...that while my interest in the Oscars has dwindled over the years I can’t recall ever having so much indifference to them than I do the year of lecture-y depression and social justice movies.

Don Hall 4/19/21 Don Hall 4/19/21

I Believe... [COPS]

...that a policeman who can’t tell the difference between a taser and a pistol should not have a pistol ever.

Don Hall 4/12/21 Don Hall 4/12/21

I Believe... [Valid Feelings/Invalid Response]

...that your feelings are always valid but your reaction may not be an appropriate response. Your anger is valid; your follow-up tantrum combined with destroying property is not. Your desire for attention is valid; your follow-up shit-tweeting to get it is not.

Don Hall 4/5/21 Don Hall 4/5/21

I Believe... [The Bacon of Journalism]

...that the internet is the bacon of journalism if journalism was vegan and temptation to cut corners and justify bullshit got them a taste of that delicious pig.

Don Hall 3/29/21 Don Hall 3/29/21

I Believe... [It's the Guns, Morons]

...that the “needs of the many” are answered in bans on automatic, semi-automatic and pump-action shotguns.

Don Hall 3/22/21 Don Hall 3/22/21

I Believe... [GenX Bliss]

I believe… that one of the current thrills of being GenX today is that I couldn’t give two shits about what’s going in any university, with Teen Vogue, or the Grammies.

Don Hall 3/15/21 Don Hall 3/15/21

I Believe... [Time for Some Old Fashioned Filibuster Reform]

...that bringing back the “you have to talk the whole fucking time” filibuster is the key to bipartisanship. Put your mouth where that dirty money was, ass-to-mouthers.

Don Hall 3/8/21 Don Hall 3/8/21

I Believe... [Survival is like Nipple Glue]

...that the daily battle between plodding through each day to survive on most levels and motivating yourself to do better, be better, is like nipple glue on the pastie of an athletic burlesque performer—barely hanging on from dance to dance.

Don Hall 3/1/21 Don Hall 3/1/21

I Believe… [A Potato Has No Gender, Idiots]

I believe… that if the renaming of “Mr. Potatohead” to “Potatohead” is the hill you’re going to die on, you may need to get some sort of professional evaluation.

Don Hall 2/22/21 Don Hall 2/22/21

I Believe... [Rush Who?]

I believe... that hearing that Rush Limbaugh has passed on affects me much in the same way as when I hear about someone I heard yelling about something once in a high school auditorium and then promptly blocked the memory from existence.

Don Hall 2/15/21 Don Hall 2/15/21

I Believe... [ Grogu is the Unifier]

...that the fact that we all find Grogu fucking adorable indicates that we all are far more similar than we are different.