I Believe... [Humping Amazon Boxes?]
...that polyamory is simply people without the ability to commit to an arrangement more important than individual desire. The most polyamorous creature on the planet is a mutt that humps everything from other dogs to human legs to Amazon boxes.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 31, 2023
You know how people were once given their last names based on the job they did? Black from blacksmith, Baker from, well, baking, etc. Lynch is an awkward last name.
The Hornet That Stings
There are two purposes of comedy: to make us laugh at ourselves or to make us laugh at others.
The Bar
The man picked up the tumbler, downed the whiskey in one swallow and slammed the glass on the glistening mahogany. He shuddered. “That did the trick.” His black eyes moved to the bartender, shoving his glass towards him. “But that ain’t Jameson’s, ace. Don’t try that again.”
I Believe... [Poor Things Sort of Hit Home]
...that Poor Things is the best film of 2023 despite the fact that apparently I was married to Bella and the movie leaves me feeling slightly nauseated.
Things That Should Be Left in 2023
Hey! It’s an end-of-the-year listicle! Groovy.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 24, 2023
The only thing better than spending Christmas money is watching your kids play with their new Christmas toys among the shreds of wrapping paper, torn cardboard boxes, and squeals of perfect, youthful laughter.
2023 Debunked Body Positivity
2023 brought three billion dollar phenomena that slaps the blubbery jowels of this entire concept revealing a deep hypocrisy underneath the fleshy folds of this “fat is healthy and beautiful” mantra.
I Like to Watch | The Best Movies of 2023
In assessing my favorites for the year, I look at my initial reaction, how long the film sits with me, and whether or not I want to see it repeatedly after.
The Word of 2023 is...
Lots of uncertainty and, as is typical, uncertain people tend to get anxious and pissy.
I Believe... [Santa Heavy Lifting]
...that, if Santa were actually real, he’d have a hard time wrapping both a Trump conviction and a Trump presidency for the population of the US. If he’s real, he might be able to pull it off, though.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 17, 2023
Sometimes life can feel like the final week before your next haircut. It’s awkward and difficult to manage, but know that better (hair) days are ahead.
I Believe... [Yes or No Questions]
...that anytime anyone demands you answer a ‘yes or no’ question, it’s a trap.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 10, 2023
I love watching women walk in heels. It’s either sexy or clumsy and either way, it always makes me smile.
Striking for Jobs That Will Soon No Longer Exist
Simply put, these unions are fighting a battle against two things: greed and technological advance. They may win (and have been) in the short term but it’s really just fighting a battle for jobs that will no longer exist in ten years.
The Cold Case
I’m sure he killed my aunt. There’s no way she would’ve have killed herself and left him my cousins.
I Believe... [Musky Tantrum]
...that Elon Musk decided to destroy the thing he was forced to buy.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | week of December 3, 2023
There’s so much shit going on that if a civil war were to occur, most of us wouldn’t even know what side we’re fighting for or against. America, like a cranky toddler, needs a goddamn nap.
Fighting Unwinnable Battles Will Exhaust What Good Can Be Done
No debates, no stalemates.
I Believe... [Wear Out or Rust?]
...that each of us will either wear out or rust from complacency and I’’m choosing to completely wear this body out like Charlie Parker minus the heroin.