I Believe... [Wear Out or Rust?]
...that each of us will either wear out or rust from complacency and I’’m choosing to completely wear this body out like Charlie Parker minus the heroin.

New Generational Nicknames
They’re sort of like astrological signs, casting individuals into large groupings in some sort of mystical horseshit to explain why someone born in July is aggressive or someone born in February is elusive.

Performative Apathy | A Brief Guide to Navigating Meaningless Conversations
The key difference between apathy (the state of simply not giving a shit) and performative apathy (the appearance of not giving a shit to accomplish a swift exit from a circular and pointless argument with an outraged person seeking validation rather than communication) is big.
I Believe... [In Corporal Punishment]
...that adults who truly believe that words are violence were never slapped in the mouth for talking back or walloped with a belt for bullying their sibling.

Dear John: A Customer of My Ex-wife Reviews the Book
When, this weekend, I was alerted to a new Goodreads review of the book, I opened up the website to discover a Five-Star review of the book from...
...one of her clients. When I say "client" I mean "john." By “john” I mean “paying customer.”
I Believe... [A Five-Part Story]
A quick slice of life in 2023 America

The Expectation Trap
If you expect to fail, you will.

A Case for Commonality versus Group Identification
Our differences are minimal with two exceptions: economic class and political influence. Everything else boils down to cultural costumes and religious belief.
I Believe... [Do Something, Already]
...that the solution to most of our anxiety is to do something. Anything. Anxiety resides in the space of a fear of the unknown. Action solves that problem.

What's Wrong with Marvel?
The results are obvious. It’s a freaking mess.
I Believe... [Pick Up Lines]
...that among the worst or best pick up lines for a potential date is “Hey. What’s your favorite dinosaur?”
I Believe... [365 Halloween]
...that, with all the identities being claimed in our modern age, we’re just celebrating Halloween every day of the year!

No True Objectivity and Yet...
Moral relativism aside, Western society is engaging in an attempt to reframe reality in postmodernist terms.

On Believing What You Hear About the World
According to national surveys the current state of media is that it is overwhelmingly viewed as not to be trusted. Common sense observation indicates the same.
I Believe... [Preserve the Peace]
...that some plans should just be planned and executed rather than telegraphed to preserve the peace.
I Believe… [Best Pizza in the World]
..that no pizza in the world compares to Chicago’s Pequod’s. Fight me.

The War in the Middle East Brought to You by Dupixent
Like being presented with a video of a kid’s head being lopped off on a soccer field briefly interrupted by a call to action involving Skittles. It’s ugly, it’s unnecessary, it’s exhausting.
I Believe... [C'Mon!]
...that the moment when any rock singer barks out “C’mon!” before a massive guitar riff is the moment I say “OK! Fucking A! C’mon!”

Listing the Fuckups is More Helpful Than the Other List
The size of your successes matches the size of your failures.
I Believe... [Profundity Comes From Heartache]
...that we are our most profound when broken hearted.
...that the fact that my staff sees JK Simmons’s performance in “Whiplash” as a ‘comically evil version of me’ says a lot about my approach to management.